So today i woken up at 6.30 am i couldn’t sleep and also hadn’t got the energy to get up i just need sleep and i can’t seem to get it, plus i can’t stop sneezing dad called me at 7.30 and i came down stairs. Its bin day and because sarah hasn’t been in for the last day i’ve had to empty the bins and pull the wheelie bins up the 52ft back garden and then unlock the back gate to allow the Blaby District Council Bin men to collect out bins.
Its hard work pulling the bins up the garden and i’ve not had my meds yet but there isn’t anyone else and the waste just piles up if i don’t deal with it, so once i’ve done that i need to go and take my meds i’ve only got time to have a glass of milk this morning to take my meds then i need to do the washing up and give the front room a hoover.
I’m ready to go volunteering this morning at Glenfield Hospital so as soon as there done i’m off out until 11 ish.
At 8.45 am sarah rang to say she is coming so I’ve just been and picked her up from home and dropped her off at ours but she knows that whether she comes in or not she will still be paid, even if she phones in sick I have to pay her so sometimes I think she fakes that she is sick just to spend a day in bed!
I know one thing though I’m starting to run out of steam and making myself unwell at the same time. I just want some time away doing something else for a day were I don’t have to worry about if dad is safe or whether he is ok, but it’s not going to happen I’m a unpaid carer a family member that does it because I have to because there isn’t anyone else its how life is now.
My brother and his wife just drop around every once in a while to criticise what I’m doing or have a quiet word with me about how I should be doing things he never.
His suggestions yesterday were?
- End you relationship with jenny then you can be here every evening should dad need you.
- Call it a day with hospital volunteering then you will have time to take dad out in the day.
- Stop being a trustee for mosaic shaping disability services and stop supporting the carers centre dedicate your time to dad.
He don’t understand these things keep me busy and give me some downtime but I just need some time out.